Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Controversial musings...PART 2


Kiss today goodbye,
the sweetness and the sorrow.
Wish me luck, the same to you.
But I can't regret
what I did for love, what I did for love.

Look my eyes are dry.
The gift was ours to borrow.
It's as if we always knew,
and I won't forget what I did for love,
what I did for love.

Gone,
Love is never gone.
As we travel on,
Love's what we'll remember.

Kiss today goodbye,
and point me t'ward tomorrow.
We did what we had to do.
Won't forget, can't regret
what I did for
Love


I have come to that point in life where more people are leaving than arriving…
Seems every day I hear about someone losing a loved one, a spouse, and a partner…so sad.

Where is he? Why’d he gone so soon?
Now there ain't no way that it used to be, what now?
And everybody keeps telling me
There are may be a lot of things I miss
A lot of things I don't know
But I do know this now...
I ain't got no love
and once upon a time I had a true love.


We immortalize our sorrow in songs…in the words of songs…

Life is a book that we study.
Some of its leaves bring a sigh.
There it was written, my Buddy,
that we must part, you and I...

Nights are long since you went away.
I think about you all through the day,
my buddy, my buddy,
Nobody (or "no buddy") quite so true.
Miss your voice, the touch of your hand-
Just long to know that you understand,
My buddy, my buddy,
Your buddy misses you.

Buddies through all of the gay days.
Buddies when something went wrong.
I wait alone through the gray days,
missing your smile and your song...

Nights are long since you went away.
I think about you all through the day
My buddy, my buddy,
No Buddy quite so true.
Miss your voice, the touch of your hand-
Just long to know that you understand,
My buddy, my buddy,
Your buddy misses you.


“My Buddy” is a song for today that was written by Harry James in 1939.

We all join in and mourn when a woman loses her husband or a mother loses her child but what about all those lonely people women who have lost the love of their life who was also a woman?

What about a man who loses his life partner of 30 something years who just happened to be another man.

Those relationships often are mourned by a few and the one who remains then carries on alone.

It seems to me it’s time now to acknowledge that LOVE is good for everybody and no matter what form that love takes it should be in balance with any lasting relationship.

What about the woman who has been with the same man for many years but never married?
You hear people say, “Well you know they were never married?”

Diminished…that lack of paper and ring has diminished the relationship to something that is less than, beneath, not up to socially acceptable behavior, but there will be support for her…some close to her anyway.

It seems there is much concern that allowing marriage that is anything BUT a man and a woman will somehow weaken the FAMILY…to me it seems that the definition of family is a bit Norman Rockwell for this new century…a little stuffy and dated.

Marriages don’t hold together like they used to, families can have one parent or three, the old die has worn out and broken already and Gay marriage had nothing to do with it.

There is amongst a younger generation the feeling that names, labels and epithets are archaic things best left behind and forgotten; sexuality is more diverse and a wider range of variables are acceptable.

Still that fear masked by hate prevails in our society and that strident voice is the one we hear as the Limbaughs of the world drone on…spewing forth hate and malice in a steady stream.

Those who hate/fear so deeply use the Bible and religion as their ruler but in a country where church and state are separated how can this happen?

Then they make it a civil matter and pass laws that defy the constitutional rights of people to find happiness based on what?

I live in a conservative part of the state of California and I must tell you that MANY of the husbands here are cheating on their wives…not with other women but with other men.

If you know where to look it is almost an epidemic of bisexuality…trust me it’s not just here it’s wider spread than that I mention the area I live in because for many years this has been the land of family values and right wing morality, big flashy churches and loud right wing voices.

Funny isn’t it what a fuss was made over Bill Clinton’s peccadilloes but how quickly they try and staunch the news when one of the right wing side gets caught in something really seedy like that fellow and his men’s room tapping foot or some congressman is caught with any human underage…or a hooker…though professional sex workers seem to be more the prevue of Evangelists at least those who haven’t been experimenting with Gay sex amongst their staff.

At the bottom of all this I am dumbfounded how fascinated so many are with the sexual machinations of the “celebrities” of our age---the constant is he or isn’t he speculations about male stars and the less than ladylike actions of some of Hollywood’s younger female notables.

But don’t you find it interesting that Ellen is less ostracized and lives an easier life as an out gay woman than most of the gay males---she did OPRAH and included an interview with her wife.

Does it mean that change is coming slowly but is on its way none the less or are we reliving the roaring and tolerant early part of the last century to be followed by a puritanical reversion to clean cut American values.

I have no answer-some of the questioning is rhetorical anyway.

Miss your voice, the touch of your hand-
Just long to know that you understand,
My buddy, my buddy,
Your buddy misses you.

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